I haven’t made New Year’s resolutions in ages. Along time ago I realized that it was a complete set-up for me. A set up for perfectionism, self- sabotage and just feeling pretty awful about myself.
I would resolute to embark on these really big things and not even ask myself why. Why were these things important to me? Were they actually important to me? Did I actually want to do them? Was it because that’s what I thought I was supposed to do? Was it because that’s what “everyone else” was doing?
I generally embarked on these resolutions alone. I might have told one or two people, but not wholeheartedly. Because deep down I really didn’t believe in myself and thought that there was a good chance that I wouldn’t follow through. So why tell the whole world only to fail, swimming in humiliation and embarrassment?
I don’t blame myself, it’s the best I knew how to do at the time. What I know today is that I was completely setting myself up for “failure“ because I didn’t have support and accountability around me. I was setting myself up because I wanted to climb mountains but didn’t even own a pair of sneakers. In other words, I didn’t have the tools nor doable action steps to achieve what I was aiming for.
I also wanted to accomplish everything right away. I wanted to go at a sprinter’s pace on a marathon journey. Doing it this way only caused disappointment, frustration and burn-out.
I do it a lot differently now. I really invest time to take stock and do introspective work to find out my priorities and passions for the upcoming year. I make plans and know that those plans may change. Nothing is set in stone and there are no absolutes.
I enlist supports. I remember that “small” changes, “small” actions can lead up to great transformation. I set realistic goals and doable action steps that don’t feel like weights shackled to my back.
A few years ago I set out to define simple morning and evening routines that would work for and serve me. By taking manageable steps and implementing new things little by little, several years later I still have these anchors in my life.
The cool thing is that as I start practicing new things, overtime they become habits and then I don’t have to think about them anymore, they’re just something that I do. And it’s our habits that change our life.
If you want to know more, reach out. Would love to talk to you!!!
Stay tuned for part 2 with more specifics and details.
32 Comments
20li yaşlarda genç bir kız olan Kristen, çılgın bir partinin ardından ortalığı toparlamaktadır. Erkek arkadaşının da ona yardım edeceğini uman genç kız, tüm aramalarına rağmen cevap alamaz. Diğer yandan bir yabancı, Kristenı arayarak ona dışarı çıkmasını söyler. Bu kişi, Kristen hakkında herkesten çok şey bilmektedir. Ancak ilk damla kan aktığında Kristen, geç olmadan kimin, ne için bunu yaptığını bulmak zorunda olduğunu anlar. Jc Marsicek
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